stardustacolyte:

Don’t buy a girl flowers. Flowers die. Buy her a dragon.

dajo42:

"tea is just leaf water!" "yeah well coffee is just bean water!" wow, it’s. it’s like everything is made of things. this door is just wood rectangle. this poster is just ink paper. this lemonade is just lemon water. wow, it’s like you can combine ingredients to make things that are more enjoyable than the initial parts of the equation. sure is a magical world we live in

holdthebones:

whatwouldyoudoifthedoctor:

deathpup:

what happens if u put a werewolf on the moon is a great question probably the best question ever asked

he’ll explode and die because there’s no oxygen on the moon

We never said we’d send him up without a suit you absolute monster

we joke about procrastination but nothing is worse than the nauseating feeling of having every intention of doing something but physically not being capable of doing it and then feeling like you want to throw up because the deadline is just getting closer and closer.

ayyy bout to head back to mississippi early ttyl

lavakid:

asexuals will win the skeleton war because we won’t be distracted by anyone’s bone titties